♥ Saturday, November 14, 2009
I AM IN MY MONTH!
Finally a breather...
I managed to catch up on my sleep last Thursday. I slept before 10pm and though there were 'interruptions' in between, I managed to compensate at least 3/4 of my lost sleep.
Today, I managed to take a long cold shower. It's been awhile since I actually spent almost an hour just to scrub, shave and feel fully cleansed right after stepping out of the bathroom. I smell damn good now! Heh!
I'm not complaining here. In fact I'm glad I was losing sleep for something worth it. Well, for now at least, I feel that it's worth it and I'm enjoying every single moment of it. I feel like a teenager once again. Those butterflies, anticipations are all back surrounding me. It's a nice feeling. It really is.
For the record, I will always remember Halloween 2009 - no matter what happens.
I ended my Halloween at 9am the next morning and I have not stopped smiling since...
I LOVE NOVEMBER! I REALLY DO...especially this year....:)
Labels: contented, MY life
Things happen for a reason
Blogged @ 1:11 PM
♥ Wednesday, October 21, 2009
THE STORY OF US
It's amazing how the break up made me feel like a celebrity who wanted to have a press conference dedicated to her fans. Of course the differences for my case are 1) I'm not a celebrity 2) I don't have fans...or do I? Whatever it is, I know there are loads of curious parties wanting to know what happened, how it happened, when it happened and why it happened.I received dozens of smses asking how I was doing and if everything was for real. I was touched. Still am actually. People I never expected to show concern, showed concern. The morning smses, the messages via Facebook, the calls, emails really melted my heart. I'm just glad those people are genuinely concerned.
Of course there are always a group of humans judging and pointing their fingers at me. To them, I say WHATEVER! Keep viewing my blog because I am so gonna feed your curiosity and blog almost every single detail about my relationship with Mohamad Zaid aka Mr Shy (oh no! I don't know how to spell his first name - no wonder I was dumped! ;p).
In the meantime, keep on judging and guessing...
Labels: eqaid, MY life
Things happen for a reason
Blogged @ 12:52 PM
♥ Sunday, October 18, 2009
BUSY BEE HAS BEEN REALLY BUSY!
As far as I can remember, I don't think I've been this occupied. I'm so busy that I don't even have time to catch up with my friends - even on the phone!
I've been working hard and going to SGH every single day. By the time I come back, it'll be close to 11pm.
I don't even have time to mourn about my disengagement. Hahahaha!
Mak has finally been discharged yesterday and thankfully she is recovering well. Alhamdulillah.
I've got lots to update. I can't wait to update you guys about my break up and please guys, don't sympathize me. Be happy with me as I am a much happier person now. My close ones can vouch for that...:)
Labels: MY life
Things happen for a reason
Blogged @ 10:07 PM
♥ Saturday, October 10, 2009
PLEASE BE STRONG
Mak was diagnosed with Tongue cancer 2 weeks ago. She had to remove her tongue partially. The thought of her being in the operating theatre is scary. To see her right after her surgery was really heart-wrenching.
She had that oxygen thing on with lots of tubes piercing through her neck. For the first time, she looked like a 70 year old. A weak 70 year old.
If I could change roles with her, I would. Trust me on this. I want to take her pain away.
I can't go on. It's too much to handle and to look at.
Please pray that her will power is strong enough to go through this stage.
I'm a strong woman and I take after her. INSYALLAH, she will be strong for this too. I'm sure she wants to see me longer..
INSYALLAH, everything will go well...
INSYALLAH!
Labels: family, MY life
Things happen for a reason
Blogged @ 1:51 PM
♥ Friday, October 2, 2009
THANKS FOR MAKING IT EASIER!
Some just do not know how, where and when to draw the lines...but oh well, not everyone uses their brains...:)
Labels: MY life
Things happen for a reason
Blogged @ 12:55 PM
♥ Saturday, September 12, 2009
THE UNPREDICTABILITY OF ONE'S FEELINGS.
I was clearing my inbox after sahur this morning and there were 2 of Aid's messages dated in July. One of it was dated exactly 2 months ago - 12 July 2009. Both messages contained the words 'I Love You'. Both were sweet messages which made me melt when I read them.
What's ironic is, 2 months later his facebook page is filled with his declarations of how he doesn't feel anything at all towards our relationship and me. He changed his relationship status to 'It's Complicated' few weeks ago which led a friend of mine asking me if I was ok or not. He constantly updates his 'What's on your mind' space which brought attention to Irin that something isn't right between us. Subsequently I got a call from Radia and a message from Aizah.
See, Aid is the opposite of me. He is close to being expressionless. It's hard to hear him talking about his feelings or emotions. You have to really dig them out from him. To see him saying he loves me or how happy he is with me in public is like expecting the moon to drop from the sky. However, whenever we hit the rocks, he would be very vocal about it. He becomes the opposite. He thinks there is nothing wrong about this. I think it's just not right.
I'm vocal both ways. When I'm happy, I say it. When I'm unhappy, I say it too. It balances like that.
The only 2 persons that I told briefly about this rocky situation of mine are Elis and Zila. Even so, they do not know the full story. I don't see a need in sharing because it is the same reasons, same repeated mistakes and same lame 'explanations'. I'm sick of it and I don't wish to torment my friends with my same old stories or complaints!
Another reason I'm not talking about this is because we are engaged now and I have to respect his family and of course mine too. I don't want our parents to hear news from others besides us. Also, we're still officially engaged. As long as the ring is still in my hand, I'm still his fiance and he's still mine! Do take note of that!
Changing his relationship status and declaring his feelings to the FB citizens are just not necessary. Why tell the world when nothing is confirmed? You said you loved me 2 months ago. How sure are you that you won't love me again 2 months from now???
For now, I am not going to declare that the wedding is off. Like I said nothing is official yet. Us being us, we have the tendencies of ending up in each others' ground again after trying go to the greener grass. I don't want to say never because I don't want to end up having to eat back my words.
I don't have to update my blog for you guys to know our outcome. News travel fast. Especially news like this.
P.S To friends who care, please do not even try to talk to me about this unless I start the topic. I'm fine. I'm not feeling it yet so please respect my decision and not bring this issue up and please act normal.
Labels: eqaid, MY life
Things happen for a reason
Blogged @ 1:30 PM
♥ Sunday, August 30, 2009
MOVE OUT PLEASE!
I'm trying hard not to blog about my own flesh and blood but I need to let this out! Just a little bit.
It's time for you to move out, seriously! The corners of this house are not cute spaces to put your clutters! It has never been!
Yes, this house is not under my name but at least my identity card states this address so please, be a grown up and try to live in your own home! You have a fucking house for goodness sake and it is as big as this! From Bedok, to Simei and all the way to Pasir Ris!! Even when someone new is about to settle down here, you are still here!!!
I am so full of hatred with zero respect for you now! I hope you are reading this! Really do!
Things happen for a reason
Blogged @ 1:39 PM
